Memorial Day

On Memorial Day in Israel, we not only remember our fallen but also victims of terror. The radio plays sad songs and the television plays home video after home video of soldiers who have fallen in battle. It’s gut wrenching to watch. It’s an intense and somber day and even those of us who haven’t lived here our entire lives are deeply affected. There are few people I know who haven’t lost a friend or family member in a terrorist attack or has fallen in battle. Me included.

Today, I was reminded just how different some people live their lives here. We have cousins who are ultra-orthodox and live in an extremely religious area of Jerusalem. They are extremely sheltered and everything they see and think is filtered through a lens of pure ignorance. Once, when we mentioned how beautiful we found Amsterdam to be, a relative said, and I quote, “Amsterdam? I heard that there are needles everywhere and mothers are doing heroine in the parks while their babies starve!”

Yeah, so you see where I am coming from. Complete and utter ignorance. Anyway, we got a call this evening that one of the daughters got engaged. Yay, mazel tov! Good news all around. Then came the invite to the engagement party to be held at 8:00 p.m.

This is of course the same exact time that a siren rings and the entire country stops whatever they are doing and observes a minute of silence. Not exactly prime party time. Obviously, as a Zionist Jew I was deeply offended by this insensitive act. Look, I understand that they believe in Israel as a “state of mind and not a state” and that only when the messiah comes should Israel exist. I think its lunacy, but whatever. And have your damn inappropriate celebration, but how dare you call your secular relatives and invite them to partake in such an event? I equate celebrating on this day to eating on Yom Kippur. It’s that serious. How can they be so insensitive?

Just how removed are these people from Israeli society? Extremely. One of their sons wanted to go to the army like majority of boys his age. Rabbi Dad said no. If he goes to the army he’ll have sex with secular girls. Thoughts that aren’t exactly based in reality.

So I called them and said that we wouldn’t feel comfortable celebrating on this day. What I really wanted to say is that I think it’s inappropriate to celebrate on this day, but I held my tongue.

His answer was “I understand.”

But did he?