Tanks, Kubeh, Bourekas and Babies: A Personal History of Immigration to Israel

It turns out that Israel takes on different appearances depending on whose eyes it’s viewed through. An early twenty-something steps off the plane and sees through wide eyes a sun-kissed land filled to brimming with young olive skinned honeys filling out olive-toned uniforms in all the right places, deliciously greasy buckets of shwarma meat seductively rotating on their spits, glistening bottles of Goldstar and milky glasses of arak, and idyllic kibbutzim whose apparent main agricultural product isn’t exactly found in the SuperSol, all set to the exotic high-velocity throat music of modern Hebrew. A thirty-something longtime resident of Israel sees exactly the same thing, except it’s through the windshield of a somewhat sensible sedan as he drives his toddler to daycare. It’s all about perspective, and to understand how one perspective slowly but surely evolves into another, you have to understand how one falls in love in Israel and stays there.

• 1974. Was born.

• 1982. The son of my chazzan (cantor) visited my synagogue while on leave from the IDF. I was somewhat in awe.

• 1984. When I was ten a friend returned from a summer trip to Israel. I recall asking if there were any amusement parks there. She asked her father, and he said there was one called “Ferris Wheel” in Rishon Leztion. Israel had suddenly become an appealing place for me to visit. I enjoyed Dollywood, so I figured I’d enjoy Israel too.

• 1986. Mrs. Osmon, my Israeli Hebrew teacher at Hebrew school, had it in for me and became one of my childhood enemies. She did not endear me to Israel.

• 1987. Two Israeli students visited my Hebrew school and brought with them a cassette tape of Israeli rap. I ran like DMC.

• 1986 – 1990. Through my involvement in USY, my connection to and knowledge of Israel grew. Fought incessantly with leftist teachers at my high school about Israel. Digested every book possible about Israel to use as ammunition, Exodus included. Saw movie. Had crush on Karen Hansen Clement. Worried about Israel and was glued to CNN during the Gulf War. The chazzan from my synagogue went to volunteer. Was in awe.

• 1991. Visited for the first time as a participant on USY Poland Seminar/Israel Pilgrimage. Holocaust bad. Israel good. Refused to wear sandals. Drank a lot of Kinley. Was in awe of the IDF.

• 1994. Ms. Carmel, my Israeli Hebrew teacher in college, had it in for me and became one of my adulthood enemies.

• 1994 – 1997. Became heavily involved in pro-Israel activism on the campus of SUNY Albany. Many debates with Anti-Zionists and Israel-haters. By the time I left they were still Anti-Zionists and Israel-haters. Started to hate myself. Was in awe of all of friends who made aliyah and served in the IDF. Decided that I too want to serve in the IDF.

• 1997 -1998. Made Aliyah. Got drunk a lot. Ate kubbe soup for the first time. Rejoiced. Enjoyed hummus as a meal. Naomi, my Hebrew teacher at ulpan, did not have it in for me. Left ulpan early to be drafted into the IDF. Served in the Armored Corps. Learned to love, then hate and finally respect tanks. Got dirty. Wasn’t as a good shot as I thought I was. Spent Israel’s 50th anniversary on guard duty. Thought that was cool. Lost 30 pounds. Began a life long relationship with baby wipes. Gained perspective. Listened to Berry. Met my future wife.

• 1999 – 2007. Bourekas, majadra, meorav yerushalmi. Cremshnitz, za’atar, Golan apples. Lahmajun, sabich, samboosak. Hummus. Worked at a myriad of start-ups. All failed. Not my fault. Got married. Strong relationship. Worked in print journalism and then ISRAEL21c. Learned that Israel is hi-tech and cures diseases. Started business. Business succeeds. Had baby. Was in awe. Baby succeeds. Named her Tzofia after my favorite line of Hatikvah. Am in awe.

• 2008. Hate the politicians. Left and Right. Secular and Religious. Frustrated with the leadership. Demand change. Understand why they don’t but wishing our greatest minds would run this country. Love my family. Love my friends. Love my country. Want to help fix it. Hummus still delicious.

The 60 Bloggers project is co-production of Jewlicious.com and the Let My People Sing Festival. It is published daily for 60 days to celebrate Israel’s 60 birthday.

Tags: hummus, IDF, israel, Jerusalem, kubbe, soup